Feeling Immune, a sign that hope has been forsaken

Feeling Immune, a sign that hope has been forsaken

Sometimes I feel that hope is the one thing that causes the down fall of many people. People hope and expect certain outcomes. They have taken action and they have guided events to create the outcomes they want, but yet, outcomes doesn’t always happen the way they envisioned it to be. They use their hearts and minds to hope positively. Yet, it is the hope that crushes them through repeated disappointment and failure, sometimes of no fault of themselves. If…

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Struggles and Pain

Struggles and Pain

I think I have inflicted so much self stress and self pain that I can probably make a sadomasochistic individual feel proud. I was just thinking, in fact, all these problems and struggles are self inflicted. If I hadn’t started what I started, and I pushed through all those stupid “You are negative. You must think positive.” talks, then we won’t have ended up in this mess. If I had the knowledge and the voice to do up a spread…

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Tone it’s said, more than what is said

Tone it’s said, more than what is said

Sometimes it is not only what is said that is important, more importantly, it is the way things are being said. I, for one, do not appreciate an authoritative tone used on me. It pisses me off. It is not my fault. And I am even helping. Therefore, I do not appreciate that kind of tone on me. In fact, I will just usually drop everything and walk. I don’t have to take this. Actually, if it is wasn’t part…

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Of Karma

Of Karma

This morning got me thinking about karma. I read in the papers that Jho Low is a very charitable person as he has donated tremendously to causes through his family charity. Whether he has used his own funds or otherwise, the fact is, we cannot refute that he has given his share. Yet, now the new authorities are pillaging his items, the jet and the yacht. And the media jumps on it and painting him as the villain. This all…

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Knowing Your Niche

Knowing Your Niche

Long ago when I was back in technical college, I had the good luck and opportunity to land myself a web site development gig at a local law firm. It was one of the bigger players in the market and since the Internet scene was just gradually getting hot at that time, the law firm didn’t have a screaming website per se. Well, we came and did up the website and made it a little more professional, albeit circa 90s….

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Recharging Homebase

Recharging Homebase

I guess that’s what they call home is where the heart is. It is also a place where one normally goes to recharge himself. It should be a safe, comfortable, peaceful, comforting and familiar place. The human brain seeks familiarity and surroundings that it deems safe and comfortable and where it feels most relaxed, our old reptilian brain at least can rest for a while, and not enter a constant fight or flight mode. When we are constantly in the…

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Down Time

Down Time

Took leave today to have a good rest day. Overall, the day was pretty good, I think. I manage to get a proper full day of gaming, something that I couldn’t have imagine happening just 1 week ago. Its really quite strange, or should I say, surreal. All those times watching Youtube video on PS4 or Xbox game play and suddenly, I am grabbing my very own PS4 controller and playing the game which I wanted to play the most,…

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Pushing the personal comfort boundaries

Pushing the personal comfort boundaries

We all get irritable and cranky sometimes when we are feeling tired and a lack of sleep. Was trying to get some sleep last evening, albeit late at past midnight and managed to drift off to sleep and at about 2:30am in the morning, felt something that brushed against my arm. I thought it was just the fabric on the pillow but it felt a little different, a little sharper this time round. And I opened my eyes and found…

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Of New Experiences

Of New Experiences

I got a brand new PS4 Pro recently due to the reconstruct with my ISP. Quite the funny thing. The fact was I was trying to get an Xbox S about 3 months back and was convinced (by myself of course) that I can sell the Fidelio and use the Xbox as a Blu-ray player. The problem is, I haven’t found out that the library loaned out Blu-Ray disc and I guess, it was just an excuse to get into…

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Chest Pains

Chest Pains

Am having minor chest pains recently after my coughing fits. I thought the cough and flu has gone away but seems like I’m still having runny nose and some coughing fits moments. Gone to the gym today to work on my chest day and the chest started hurting and I started panting. So I took longer breaks before continuing my next set. Since I’m alone again at home, I decided to go for a short jog after dinner and the…

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